Title: Breaking Apart

Author: Geonn

Email: neil_j_miser@yahoo.com

Fandom: Stargate SG-1

Pairing: Sam/Janet

Spoilers: "Legacy," vaguely

Rating: Older Kids


Jack: "Let's say, for the sake of argument, that it is the Stargate - a theory to which I do not ascribe. Then why don't we put a little sign at the base of the ramp that says 'Gate travel may be hazardous to your health'? I can live with that."

Sam: "So can I, Sir."

-- Stargate SG-1, episode "Legacy"

 

Sam undressed slowly, carefully, favoring her right side, but only because it hurt slightly less than the left. She stepped into the shower stall, feeling the aches and pains of the past few missions wearing on her joints. She resisted the urge to groan out loud as she turned the hot water faucet. She put her hands out, leaning forward and letting the water spray over her head, down her back, dripping all around her like a miniature waterfall.

She closed her eyes and prayed for the heat to ease her pain. It felt so much worse now... and she hadn't been that beaten during the mission; it had been relatively easy. The pain had started as soon as they got back to the SGC and grew as she made her way to the locker room. By the time she pushed her way through the door, even Colonel O'Neill had decided she should take the first shower.

It must be much worse than it felt if he saw it that clearly.

Deciding not to keep the guys waiting longer than necessary, she grabbed for the faucet to turn the spray off. Her fingers twisted around air. She sighed at her sudden lack of coordination, opened her eyes and tried again. Her fingers passed through the faucet as if they weren't even there.

Jerking away from the wall, she stumbled over the lip of the tub... but the heels of her feet passed right through it. Panting, she turned to the mirror and found herself tumbling face-first towards the tile.

A quick glance down and she saw that her right leg stopped just below her knee. The left foot had broken off at the ankle. No blood, no gore, just... stumps.

She couldn't breathe, couldn't comprehend what was happening. She tried to crawl forward, dragging herself across the tile in search for help. It didn't matter that she was naked, nothing mattered...

She felt body parts being left behind as she scooted across the floor... felt herself dissolving into the tile. When she finally tried to scream, she realized only her face was left. No lungs, no vocal cords, no...

---

"...No," she gasped, sitting up in bed. Her nightshirt clung to her chest, her hair plastered to her forehead with sweat. She fought with the blankets, muttering, "No, no, no," until powerful arms wrapped around her from behind. She stuttered, "N-n-n-n-n-n," fighting until lips found the nape of her neck and the hands tightened on her arms.

She rolled over, clutching Janet tightly to her chest and inhaling the other woman's natural scent. Her skin carried faint traces of shampoo, soap and perfume, but it was the underlying, permanent smell that brought Sam back to reality. She kissed Janet's collar, letting the brunette hold her.

"What was it?" Janet asked.

"The Stargate," Sam managed after another minute. "I... had been through the Stargate too many times. My body couldn't... it wouldn't stay together. I fell apart... right in the middle of the locker room. I just di-dissolved away."

Janet smoothed Sam's hair, rocking her slightly. "It's okay, sweetheart. It was just a nightmare."

"We know so little about the physics and the science of the Stargate..."

Janet pushed Sam back slightly so she could look into the other woman's wide, frightened eyes. "Sam. No matter what happens, you're safe."

Sam pressed her head against the soft curve of Janet's neck; the only place she felt safe enough to cry, protected enough to be frightened. "And what if I start falling apart?" Sam whispered, lips moving against Janet's nightshirt like the shadow of a kiss.

Janet kissed the top of Sam's head. "I'll just have to hold you together."


Geonn

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